… how can summer stress can push a relationship over the edge?
As the sun sets on summertime, September is fast becoming the top month to divorce.
Over recent years divorce lawyers and relationship counsellors have noted a surge in enquiries related to divorce and separation after the summer holidays, and Autumn can quickly become a busy season for many family law practises.
Billed as an opportunity to escape the hamster wheel of day-to-day stress and responsibility,’ the holiday’ is often considered to be a chance to relax, unwind and reconnect with your partner.
And whilst this is often the case, a long-awaited and much-needed break for both parties can actually serve to highlight the cracks in a relationship and exacerbate any underlying unresolved issues.
For couples already experiencing problems in their marriage or relationship, a week or two away from the daily grind is not enough to sort fundamental matters out.
In addition to this, witnessing other happy couples on holiday can highlight personal unhappiness in a relationship and the reality of spending long periods of time together can create further problems.
Children can add a whole new dimension to the summer holidays.
Yes there’s the fun stuff you don’t normally do and the ‘quality time’ together but couples frequently experience increased levels of stress as a result of balancing work and childcare during the school break, in addition to escalating associated financial demands.
For couples whose marriages are struggling, this extra strain can really create a pressure cooker scenario. Throw a holiday on top of this, in which the family’s daily stresses and tensions are placed under further duress in an artificial environment and effectively under a microscope, and it’s no wonder the lid can explode.
Post-summer, post-holiday you might be emotionally and physically exhausted.
Your relationship may have completely broken down and your mind might be made up or perhaps your marriage is still salvageable but you feel confused and unsure.
But one thing is true, you have options …
Marriages and relationships can break down for all manner of reasons. In many instances, joint counselling can be an excellent idea for couples who are experiencing problems and struggling to communicate. Organisations such as Relate can offer a calm, civilised and impartial environment in which both parties can discuss and explore the issues and their feelings about the marriage.
Seeking legal advice, at the earliest possible stage before separation, is the most sensible course of action. A specialist family lawyer can advise on your position and options, and give information about family finances and negotiating the financial settlement. This is especially important if you are financially the weaker party.
If it’s over
On the other hand, you may have already tried counselling, given your marriage another shot or perhaps the relationship is now no longer healthy.
Whatever the reason, if you feel that divorce is your only option, now may well be the time to consult a specialist family lawyer to discuss your options and better understand your position.
Where you stand
Regardless of the timing, in many cases the thought of divorce can be both heart breaking and confusing, particularly where children are concerned. It’s also very common for your thoughts and feelings about your marriage and the possibility of divorce, to shift and change over time, back and forth.
At SH&Co., we know that making the decision to divorce can be incredibly difficult and painful, and that only you can do it.
And whether you’ve made that decision for sure or not, we are here to help you understand the process, discuss your options and clarify your position.
If you’d like more information or just to have a chat, call us on 01606 48777 to book yourself a FREE 30 minute appointment with one of our family lawyers or pop in to one of our FREE drop-in Family Law clinics.